Updated: Jan 16, 2021
Yesterday, in response to the global pandemic, the provincial government in Ontario implemented a mandatory stay at home order for the next 28 days.
I am currently self-isolating at home and feeling all the feelings.....
As much as I love my own company, so many fears well up inside me when I realize that I am basically navigating the world on my own these days. And, it's so easy to become overwhelmed with fear, sadness, depression and loneliness if I let myself. And, I know I am not alone in feeling this way.
Rather than allowing myself to "go down the rabbit hole", I've decided to focus on using this precious time for self-reflection, focused work, learning, creative expression and reaching out to others for support, and to offer support wherever I am able.
As I sit here at my dining room table trying to figure out what's next, I notice that that the sun has come up and is now setting and I haven't seen a soul all day. I'm sure that I am not alone in experiencing this either. Thankfully, I know that I have incredible friends and family who are always there for me - but I sure am missing being in community with all of you right now.
So, I thought I'd share this journal entry that I wrote on January 2nd (but was too chicken to post). It's hard for me to share and be vulnerable, but here goes....
Journal Entry from January 2, 2021
My Radical Reset
When is the last time that you carved out some time just for yourself? Time enough to ask yourself the hard questions. A time to sit with yourself long enough to hear yourself think? To take the time to get outside your head and into your heart. To feel yourself breathe. When is the last time you did that? As we kick off this new year, we all have the opportunity to start with a brand-new canvas. At a time when things seem so challenging for so many people around the world, it’s more important than ever to ground ourselves.
A few days before the end of 2020, I decided I needed a radical reset of some sort.
Let’s face it, it’s been a tough year for everyone on the planet. After a year of working from home and always being connected online, I desperately need some personal time to unplug from the internet, get off the grid, and take a fierce inventory of life.
Over the holidays, I realized I have been coping with so much over the past year beyond the global pandemic - and it is high time that I carve out the time to turn off and tune in to myself. So, I booked two weeks off work. The first thing I did was take a fierce inventory of my personal and family life, my love life, finances, and the need for boundaries and balance.
I realized that If I allow myself to put everything and everyone else first, I’ll never achieve my dreams. AND, What are my dreams anyway?
For the past few years, I’ve been asking myself how can I use my superpowers (we all have them) to truly make a difference in my work, my community and in the world?
I decided to enlist a professional coach to support me in this process. Her first direction was for me to identify my values, and my top 3-5 strengths. This was challenging for me because I’ve been so focused on being a support to my family, friends, colleagues, and my community that its hard to concisely identify what my values and strengths actually are.
I’ve always felt very comfortable taking a “backstage” role in my work as a “promoter” for most of my career. I started in my twenties as a nightclub owner/operator promoting musicians and touring acts, then became a festival and events producer/promoter, then an economic developer promoting culture and communities, and now I promote artists, exhibitions and events in my current role.
I am realizing now that I am very comfortable empowering others. But what about me?
Perhaps its safer promoting other people's books, art, music, projects?
Perhaps I'm hiding out in this role?
What are MY hopes and dreams?
Back to the work….
So, I find myself contemplating the following hard questions:
1- What is your purpose on this planet? 2- What work would you do if money wasn’t a motivator? 3- What do you want to create in the world? 4- How can you use your talents and connections to bring your purpose to life and truly make a difference in the world? 5- What is your medium? (How will you do it?)
SO, I have an opportunity over the next 28 days to dig deep and explore these ideas.
And so do you....
With all of life’s challenges right now, it’s more important than ever to focus on what we all want to CREATE instead of living in fear of the unknown. After all, fear paralyzes us and stops us from moving forward.
Why not seize this quiet time in life to rest, re-evaluate, and re-set our reality?
What IS within our control? What differences CAN we all make on this planet? How CAN we be of service to others that are suffering? How can we walk lightly on this beautiful Earth that we call home?
So many questions to ponder…..perhaps you will join me? That would be FUN!
Sending you peace and love always,